


Covert Love

by parkjinchu



Series: Covert Love [1]
Category: ASTRO (Band)
Genre: Fluff, M/M, a bit of angst idk?, idrk what this is i just wrote it but it sounds kinda nice i guess
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-26
Updated: 2017-01-26
Packaged: 2018-09-20 01:33:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,394
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9469544
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/parkjinchu/pseuds/parkjinchu
Summary: Through the span of a few weeks, Jinwoo goes over the struggles of keeping a romantic relationship a secret. Along the way, he discovers more ways to love, and more of those who love. Though - isn't that a secret, too?Or, a ridiculously sweet and kinda bumpy road along Myungjin being loving to each other.this is a work of fiction, and in no way represents the real lives of astro's members. in case of astro/fantagio/reasonable fan request, this fic will be taken downread full disclaimer on my profile





	

**Author's Note:**

> OKAY i dont really know where i was going with this but i really like it and if any aroha out there read this and enjoy it - im thinking of writing a second part with a side story explaining moonbin and eunwoos story. so if you liked this pls give me a shout and ill write that :p
> 
> NSFW SIDE NOTE: there is no smut in this fic but sex is mentioned (not explicitly) and discussed. there is a make out scene too.

Dripping with sweat, Jinwoo settles himself against the wall, sliding onto the ground and heaving with tired breaths. Myungjun just barely crawls across the floor toward him, resting on his own stomach and leaving foggy remains of his breath on the ground. The other members are scattered around the practice room, struggling to catch their breaths as they finish up for the night, drenched in their own exhaustion.

After a few minutes of wiping sweat onto their already damp sweater sleeves, they each slowly get their things together and make their way home. Jinwoo slides the key into the dorm room lock, pushing it open and letting everyone inside before him. He pretends not to notice Moonbin hold the door open for Dongmin, gently leading him inside their separate room with a hand on the small of his back. A twang of jealousy sparks in Jinwoo’s heart at their single bunk-bed room.

Myungjun waits for him to shut the door again, backpack sliding off his shoulders and eyelids drooping as he stands patiently. “Go shower – you’re exhausted,” Jinwoo tells him, pulling Myungjun’s back pack off his back and holding it in his arms. There’s no one around to see them – he runs a hand through the older boy’s light coloured hair, giving it a ruffle.

“I’ll have a quick one, if you do, too,” Myungjun says, hooking his coat on the coat rack and welcoming the warm apartment. Sanha wanders into the living room, phone in his hand, and ends of his hair slightly damp.

“We’ve learnt that quick showers make time and enough warm water for everyone in Winter,” Jinwoo comments, and Myungjun rolls his eyes.

“You know what I mean,” he mutters, narrowing his eyes. Jinwoo does know what he means – at this time of night, Sanha plays games on his phone and Minhyuk watches dance videos in the lounge, together. Other times, Sanha plays music and Minhyuk must come up with on-the-spot choreography (though this is often noisy and has received complaints from the rest of the group). Dongmin and Moonbin are off doing their own thing, or joining in the festivities in the living room in attempts to keep them quieter.

This means Jinwoo and Myungjun get some time alone in the bedroom for four, to spend snuggling in secret and sharing idle chatter between them. Even kisses and soft touches of their skin together, in these few minutes alone. It’s bittersweet, but the pair wouldn’t change it for the world.

He nods, letting the boy go, and makes his way to the bedroom. Minhyuk sits on the corner of one lower bunk, reading over the back of a face-mask pack. “Want one?” He asks gently, holding a packet out for his leader. Jinwoo politely declines, and begins unpacking Myungjun’s bag. “Why do you always unpack his bag, Jinwoo?” Minhyuk asks from below him, smoothing out the mask on his skin.

The question almost takes him aback, but as a leader, Jinwoo has learnt to keep his composure. He wouldn’t say anything about his relationship with Myungjun, of course, so instead he says, “I’m just being helpful – he always forgets and he often leaves food to rot away in his bag, the idiot,” the leader says, pulling out a warm apple as an example.

Minhyuk grimaces, but his giggle defies the look on his face. He stands, grabbing his phone and the empty face mask package and leaves the room. As he opens the door, Myungjun stands with a towel in his hand, scrubbing at his wet hair. “Your turn,” he mutters to Jinwoo, smiling gently. Only Jinwoo can see the excitement in his smile as he sits on the top bunk and waits patiently for him to collect his clothes and shower.

As Jinwoo prepares, his thinks about his boyfriend and the circumstances of their relationship. Keeping it a secret from their group was hard work, especially living in such a small space. However, they worked through it, savouring small moments alone and enjoying each moment as it came. They’d kept the secret locked up between them for more than six months now.

_“I have a secret, Jinwoo…” Myungjun says, as they lay on their stomachs, side by side. Jinwoo is scribbling song lyrics into a notebook, as the other boy’s get their make-up and costume prep done. They’re in the opposite corner from everyone else; secluded._

_“Mmm?” Jinwoo inquires, a gentle hum to show he’s listening. Myungjun feels too close, his heart is picking up speed in his chest._

_Myungjun nudges their shoulders together, “Jinwoo, look at me. It’s important,” he urges, and Jinwoo drops his pen._

_“Is everything okay, MJ?”_

_A blush decorates Myungjun’s cheeks and the bridge of his nose. If his hair weren’t covering the tips of his ears, Jinwoo would think he was red there, too. It was adorable, and Jinwoo wanted to kiss the red patches. “Y-Yeah… I just… Have a confession…”_

Sometimes, they ask each other why they work so hard to keep it a secret from their close friends. They usually come to the same conclusion; they don’t want to distract their members from their hard work and training, and the more people they tell the more chance they have of risking their outing to the rest of the world. Additionally, they like the privacy, the fact that no one but their manager knows (they told him a few weeks later, so he could keep an eye on their behaviour in case they got too loved-up in public. He’d smiled a big cheery smile and mussed their hair upon his finding out).

Making his way back to the bedroom, he checks on Sanha and Minhyuk in the living room. Minhyuk is trying, over and over again to get a dance move correct as Sanha critiques him. In the room beside this one, through the door, he can hear the soft chatter of Moonbin and Dongmin. He smiles to himself, and shuts the bedroom door behind him quietly.

“Hello, JinJin,” Myungjun greets, shutting off his phone and shoving it under his pillow.

“Hello, MJ,” Jinwoo smiles, climbing up to join his boyfriend on the bunk bed. Myungjun lays back, shuffling over to allow room for the slightly younger boy. Immediately as Jinwoo lays down, Myungjun clings onto his side, wrapping his arms around his waist and intertwining their legs. “Hello,” Jinwoo repeats, softer and against Myungjun’s forehead.

Bringing a hand into Myungjun’s hair, his fingers twist around the light hairs. His other hand runs over the boy’s back, gently tracing his fingers over the soft skin of Myungjun’s back. It’s sweet, and loving, and _chaste_. Myungjun mewls beneath him, snuggling his face further into the space between Jinwoo’s neck and chest.

After a few minutes of silence and enjoying each other’s company, Myungjun quietly asks, “Have you written any new lyrics lately?” One of his hands has moved to Jinwoo’s chest, fingers tracing over his ribcage.

Jinwoo hums in approval, shifting his legs around. Their limbs part, and Myungjun appears upset until Jinwoo drags him impossibly closer, their bodies perfectly aligned, chests pressed together.

“What about?” Myungjun teases, peering up at Jinwoo through his lashes. His eyes are curved into crescents like moons as he giggles softly, knowing the answer was _him_. Chuckling, the ash-haired boy ruffles his boyfriend’s hair, and presses a kiss to his forehead. “Ah, you love me, right?”

Jinwoo scoffs, “Of course I do.” His hands leave Myungjun’s side, cupping his chin. “You’re Myungjun. I love Myungjun,” he giggles, pressing a long, soft kiss to the other boy’s lips, pulling his chin closer. The light haired boy giggles as his lips are captured by Jinwoo’s, and he grabs his shoulder and pulls him closer again.

“You’re so _cheesy_ ,” he laughs, pressing a kiss to Jinwoo’s nose, and another to his cheek.

“You love it.”

“I most certainly do.”

Silence falls over them again, almost lulling them to sleep after a short while. If not for Minhyuk in the opposite room leaping up and down, causing a ruckus with Sanha, they would have fallen asleep in such a compromising position. Myungjun still manages to drift off, but Jinwoo stays conscious in case any of the other boys waltz in unannounced. He doesn’t want to let go of Myungjun, his warm body pressed into his side and the smell of his shampoo alluring.

He hears the noise in the living room settle after a while, and he slowly opens his eyes. Gently, he shimmies his sleeping boyfriend to the bunkbed pressed against his. Though Myungjun is asleep, he still whines softly at the loss of contact, arms lamely searching for the missing body he once clung too. “Shh, baby,” Jinwoo whispers soothingly, patting his head as he tucks him under the blankets.

Sliding back onto his bed, he pulls the blankets over his body and lets himself fall asleep. Before the darkness of slumber pulls him under, Jinwoo hears Sanha and Minhyuk enter quietly, bidding each other goodnight. Jinwoo reaches over, and grabs Myungjun’s hand, because he missed the contact, and he knows whatever Myungjun is doing in his dreams, he’ll appreciate this, too.

 

+

Jinwoo is slow to wake up. No matter how hard he tries, nothing can seem to wake him up quickly – no amount of morning sun or caffeine can prepare him for a new day. Except, maybe, a coffee flavoured _kiss_ from none other than Myungjun, who shines as bright as the sun, anyway.

He’d been trying to keep his eyes open for a long while, now. The rest of the boys can be heard in the kitchen, chatting amongst themselves. The coffee machine rumble comes to a halt, and a few moments later, the bedroom door opens. “JinJin?” A voice calls from the floor, belonging to none other than his boyfriend.

Unable to form a coherent sentence, Jinwoo mumbles something unintelligible. “I brought you coffee,” Myungjun says, and Jinwoo stirs. “Don’t worry – I didn’t make it, Binnie did,” he laughs, sitting two mugs on the bed rail before climbing up and sitting cross-legged beside Jinwoo’s legs.

Jinwoo smiles at him, all he can muster in his fatigue fogged brain. Myungjun retrieves his own cup, taking a long sip and sighing contentedly as he puts the mug back down. He hums in approval. “JinJin… Wake up, I want some attention from you,” Myungjun bluntly demands, shaking his leg. Groaning, Jinwoo rolls over onto his back, which gives Myungjun an opening for a perfect plan.

He crawls forward, hands and knees on either side of Jinwoo’s body. It would almost seem predatory, if not for Myungjun tucking a strand of stray hair away from Jinwoo’s face, and smoothing down his bedhead. He leans forward, and presses a soft kiss to Jinwoo’s lips, quickly leaning back in case he’d overstepped a boundary (as Jinwoo was still half asleep).

Nonetheless, the boy smiles softly, a gentle mewl escaping his lips. His eyes remain closed, but Jinwoo’s arms stretch out and reach for Myungjun. The light haired boy takes this as a request for more, and he dips his head down for another kiss on his lips.

“You taste like coffee,” Jinwoo mumbles, voice rather husky from his first spoken words that day. He smiles, tugging Myungjun’s chin down once, quickly connecting their lips again. “It’s nice.”

“Well,” Myungjun mutters, sitting up and handing his boyfriend a mug, helping him sit up. “Drink it before it goes cold,” he grins.

“Thank you, MJ,” Jinwoo takes a long sip, placing one hand on Myungjun’s knee. He tells his boyfriend of his dream, which makes Myungjun laugh, a gentle cackle with his head thrown back and teeth all showing. He shines, even when he yawns widely and looks as if he may fall asleep again. Myungjun says he didn’t get much sleep.

After a few minutes together, soaking up each other’s company before a long day, and the dregs of their coffees swirling coolly at the bottoms of their mugs, they descend the bed and leave the room. In the lounge, Dongmin hovers over Sanha, helping with homework. Moonbin and Minhyuk sit side by side on the couch, phone between them, presumably watching dance videos by the looks on their stunned faces. Jinwoo smiles, the leader side of his personality beaming.

He washes up his and Myungjun’s mugs, telling the rest of the group what was in store for the day. An interview, a photoshoot, and lastly, a performance they’d been working on for a while. It was one of the busiest days they’d had in a while. Myungjun smiles tightly as Jinwoo dries their cups and puts them away.

“Are you tired?” Jinwoo asks, leaning against the kitchen counter and hovering by Myungjun’s face. The boy opposite him nods, pouting with his bottom lip poking out. Jinwoo wants nothing more than to kiss those soft lips, but he can still here Sanha packing away his homework stuff just a few feet away and Bin asking Dongmin what he should wear. He smiles softly, opting to gently poke the bottom lip back into place, a giggle escaping both of their lips. It’s romantic enough for the both of them, used to having to settle for less than this.

“We’ll come home as soon as we can tonight,” the leader explains, rubbing Myungjun’s shoulder. You can nap after the photoshoot in the car.”

The boy opposite him nods, and scurries away to prepare for the day.

From here, in the crack of Moonbin and Dongmin’s open door, he can see Dongmin laughing, a blush sprinkled across his cheeks. Jinwoo raises an eyebrow, but thinks nothing more of it.

 

+

“Oh, gosh,” Myungjun mutters, tucking his phone into his backpack and slinging it over his shoulders. Mumbling something Jinwoo can’t hear under his breath, the boy waits by the door for the rest of the group to finish leaving and begin the journey to their next destination.

Jinwoo comes up behind him, tugging gently on the handle of his backpack to grab his attention. “Are you okay, MJ?” he whispers under his breath. The ends of Myungjun’s hairs brush to the side at the fan of his breath.

Myungjun nods softly, though his eyelids droop softly. “Tired,” is all he says. His cheeks are rounded and puffy and Jinwoo feels awful that they have such a busy day when Myungjun had hardly slept at all. His arms ache to wrap around his boyfriend, pressing their bodies together comfortingly.

Jinwoo takes a look around at the rest of the members, slowly packing their things together without much care for time. They weren’t in much of a rush, either way. He takes a hold of Myungjun’s wrist and tugs him away to the bathroom, just down the hall. The boy being dragged away cares not much for what’s happening, too fatigued to even notice, really.

Pulling them inside a cubicle, Jinwoo almost feels dirty. Like in a Western film, when they sneak away to a private spot to re-enact their deepest desires in a moment of intense passion. This is nothing like that – he just wants to hold the boy in his arms and comfort him, and without the prying eyes of all else who don’t know of their affections.

Myungjun looks around once Jinwoo clicks the lock shut. “This is vulgar,” he comments, squinting slightly, searching for a reason behind their new location.

Shaking his head, the younger boy pulls Myungjun into a hug, wrapping his arms tightly around him and squeezing softly. The elder audibly sighs in relief, lazily bringing his arms to Jinwoo’s waist, fists clutching at his coat. Tucking his head into the crook of his neck, he hums in content, eyelids fluttering against Jinwoo’s skin and lips pressing a lazy kiss there as a small, inaudible thank you.

Sometimes, a hug from the one you love is all you need. Although Myungjun doesn’t bounce back into activity, he feels a lot warmer inside. Jinwoo can tell, as Myungjun starts to sway their bodies side to side as if dancing to a song they can’t hear. “I love you, JinJin,” Myungjun whispers against his collarbones.

“I love you, too,” Jinwoo replies, dragging his fingers through Myungjun’s hair.

Jinwoo thinks they’ve spent too long in here, and their manager might start to get suspicious of other, more inappropriate, happenings. He blushes at the thought, gently pulling Myungjun away from his body. “You ready to go?”

Myungjun shakes his head quickly, stepping forward and pressing their lips together for two long moments. As he pulls away, he smiles gently, clutching onto the front of Jinwoo’s coat. “ _Now_ , I’m ready,” he smiles, and steps away to unlock the cubicle. “Pretend I felt sick,” he chuckles, and opens the door for Jinwoo.

On the car ride to the performance studio, Myungjun falls asleep in the backseat. Jinwoo, positioned all the way in the front, wishes he could fix his posture, knowing he’d be in pain when he woke up. He also wishes he could gently run his fingers over Myungjun’s skin, softly soothing him deeper into sleep. He also wishes he could kiss him – but he knows that is the least possible of all, as the rest of the group quietly sing along to the radio.

 

+

As they wait on stage, the piercing screams from delighted fans fills the stadium. Gathered on stage with a bunch of other groups they look up to and others they work alongside, Jinwoo feels lost in the chaos as he greets dozens of people swarming the small stage. Someone stands above them all, a camera in hand, waiting for everyone to huddle in for a huge group photo.

Lost in the crowd, Jinwoo’s eyes settle on Myungjun, who is up on the tips of his toes and scanning his eyes over the heads that are taller than him. Eventually, their gazes meet and Jinwoo hurries to meet him. They come across each other in the middle, and almost forgetting where they were in the rush to greet one another, Jinwoo lifts his arms to wrap around the boy.

Quickly, Myungjun grabs his wrists and lowers them to his side, shaking his head with pursed lips. Jinwoo, quite dazed, nods lamely before turning away.

“JinJin,” Myungjun calls over the hustle and bustle. “I understand,” he smiles softly, and it was enough to make Jinwoo feel less isolated, even in such a crowded space. He’s never felt so different in his life.

 

+

Back at the dorm, a few days later, the group huddle around the table with take-out before them, steam rising into their faces. Chatter comfortably settles over the group, starting with how good the meal tastes, and somehow twisting and turning over many topics until it reaches love. It had begun with excitedly chatting about the new album to Minhyuk complaining he had no inspiration to write loving lyrics. After all, he’d only confessed to one person in his life, and that was about it in the ordeals of romance in Minhyuk’s youthful life.

Sanha chuckles, “At least you’ve experienced a confession! I’ve never confessed to anyone,” he covers his mouth, hiding his smile behind his hand. He shrugs after a moment, “But, you have written love lyrics before – in fact, you and Jinwoo both write a lot of lyrics. Jinwoo, have you ever confessed to anyone before?”

Jinwoo giggles, shaking his head. “No, but I’ve been confessed too,” he says, thinking back on the day Myungjun had confessed to him in the corner of a dressing room. Quite an odd place, but Jinwoo admired the fact that Myungjun couldn’t wait any longer to say what he had wanted too.

Beneath the table, he feels a kick against the side of his leg, and realises he’s been staring at Myungjun, the culprit. His boyfriend subtly seethes, raising his eyebrows as if to tell Jinwoo _he’s in big trouble_. Jinwoo almost splutters on the bite of food in his mouth, blushing viciously.

“You two, are you okay?” Moonbin asks, raising an eyebrow.

“We’re fine,” Myungjun fakes a laugh, and shoves another bite of food into his mouth. “I accidentally kicked him under the table – I didn’t think anyone would confess to Jinwoo. I was surprised,” he says, muffled words forming around half-chewed food.

Laughter falls around the table and Jinwoo can’t even feel offended because Myungjun just saved their secret – after almost spilling it. He flushes red, rolling his eyes. Damn, Myungjun, coming close to blowing their long-held cover.

“You must watch too many dramas,” Dongmin adds, smirking. “Your lyrics are too romantic for a lonely boy.”

Jinwoo laughs gently, half-heartedly agreeing. For the first time in forever, he wishes the conversation would end just here so he could go to bed and snuggle with Myungjun for a few minutes before Sanha and Minhyuk go to sleep, too.

“That was close,” Myungjun breathes with a sigh of relief as they shut the door to the four-person bedroom a while later. Sanha and Minhyuk can be softly heard in the lounge room, laughing at each other and playing around before they get sleepy.

“You didn’t make it any better,” Jinwoo huffs, peeling off his shirt and grabbing his pyjama top.

The other boy perches on the ladder of Jinwoo’s bed. “What’s that supposed to mean?” he grumbles, crossing his arms over his chest. “You were staring at me!”

“I could have just said it was a girl in high school, MJ – you didn’t have to kick me and come close to making a big mess of everything,” Jinwoo argues, clenching the shirt in his fist. He’s risen his voice, a near shout.

Myungjun’s eyebrows knit together, a frown falling upon his usually smiling lips. “I didn’t want anyone to ask questions – you’re a bit slow, you know? You could have said something about us without realising!” He snaps, voice a sharp yell.

Jinwoo groans, and as he’s about to rebut the typical ‘slow’ comment, he sees the door swing open. The younger four stand by the door, an array of confused and shocked faces arranged in a semi-circle. Jinwoo had never raised his voice before, and certainly not the happy Myungjun – it was an absurd thought. Worried for a moment that they might feel scared, the leader lowers his guard.

“Is everything okay?” Minhyuk asks quietly, a confused look twisting on his features. Perhaps it was an odd sight – Jinwoo stands without a shirt, a petulant Myungjun with his arms crossed over his chest, and the two yelling above each other.

Jinwoo feels his leader instincts kick in – he quickly tugs his shirt on, addressing all five of his friends. “Everything is fine, there’s no need to worry about anything,” he says, shifting a pointed glance at his boyfriend. The other’s nod, and slowly retreat one by one, before Jinwoo can finally shut the door again. Myungjun sighs.

“I’m sorry,” Jinwoo says, stepping forward slowly, testing the waters. They hadn’t fought before, but he was glad it was ended quickly by the rest of their friends. Myungjun smiles up at him, muttering a gentle apology, too. There’s a smile in his eyes and Jinwoo feels his chest warm up again.

“I’m sorry, too,” The boy says, lifting his arms up and beckoning the shorter one into his arms. Jinwoo slots himself between Myungjun’s legs, and wraps his arms around his waist. “Let’s be more careful, together,” he mutters, fingers tangling in the back of Jinwoo’s hair. Jinwoo nods, smiling softly.

 

+

The dorm is mostly empty, bar Jinwoo and Dongmin. The others are at the studio, practicing, but Dongmin had fallen ill and Jinwoo knew it was up to him as the leader to care for him.

Dongmin is in his bedroom, and occasionally the leader will hear the boy cough and splutter, or groan miserably. He hadn’t heard anything in a while, and worried that the handsome boy had perhaps died choking on his own sickness, Jinwoo presses his ear to Dongmin and Moonbin’s bedroom door. What he doesn’t expect, is soft sniffles.

Jinwoo steps away from the door, debating in his head what to do. His first instinct tells him to comfort Dongmin. The other side of him tells him Dongmin won’t want to share how he’s feeling. None of the boys were good at coping with sad emotions – and that’s another reason Jinwoo is grateful for such a positive and happy group of friends. They never really talked about feeling sad; but he can hear the strain in Dongmin has he tries to hold back his tears, choking on them.

Making up his mind, he raps his fist against the door, “Dongmin,” he mutters, resting his head against the wood. He hears rustling and a quick sniff. “Can I come in, please?”

“S-Sure,” Dongmin replies. When Jinwoo opens the door, Dongmin is sitting upright, body swaddled in his duvet, crumpled tissue in hand. His cheeks have red lines falling from his puffy eyes, and messy hair as if he’d run his hand through it a million times, like a quiff. He looks uncomfortable, maybe even guilty.

“Are you okay?” Jinwoo asks carefully, kneeling on the ground beside the bed, He rests his hand beside Dongmin’s leg, not on it, in case he frightens him. For the first time, when Jinwoo asks this question, Dongmin shakes his head. He chuckles, but it’s a drowned and miserable sound. “If you want, you can tell me what’s wrong. I will always listen, you know that,” Jinwoo says, cheery smile. This makes Dongmin cry some more.

Dongmin is busy. Constantly. Always headed off to a separate location than the boys, modelling or emceeing or promoting ASTRO in one way or another. Frequently exhausted from learning many languages and trying to keep up with the other boys in terms of practice, Dongmin feels left behind and useless. Though glad he can harvest attention for his friends, he feels guilty that the love his often directed at him.

“Dongmin,” Jinwoo whispers, a sad smile on his lips. “You are as much a part of this group as any one of us. Your promotions are a really big help to ASTRO, which you are a part of no matter what. I know things are tough for you, right now, but I promise that you’ll get stronger and be able to tackle everything in no time. I believe in you and your talent, a lot, Dongmin.”

“You’ll make me cry more, Leader,” Dongmin says a moment or two after he’s finished speaking. He gently shoves Jinwoo’s shoulder, and they both chuckle. “Thank you, Jinwoo. You really are the best leader,” he smiles.

“Shall I make you some soup? You’re still quite ill,” Jinwoo offers, standing up and leading them out into the lounge.

As he prepares a meal for the both of them, he watches Dongmin from the kitchen, as he stares blankly ahead of him, lips often curling downward or eyebrows connecting in between his eyes. Something must still be toying on his mind, but Jinwoo won’t push it. He brings the soup out, handing the bowl to the sick boy, and together, they watch the television.

They’re silent, until around ten minutes after they’ve both finished their meals. Jinwoo had resorted to playing on his phone, bored, when Dongmin pipes up. “Can I ask your advice on a secret?” He asks, looking down at his hands in his lap.

Jinwoo rolls over to face him, eyebrow raised. “Sure.”

Dongmin takes a deep breath, seeming to collect the words in his head. “I… What do you do if the person you like doesn’t like you back?” He asks, refusing to meet Jinwoo’s questioning eye. “I’m writing a song, that’s why,” Dongmin clarifies, pasting an awkward smile over his face.

Jinwoo thinks back on the things he used to do for Myungjun, or the things Myungjun used to do for him. “Well, let them know how special you are. Help them out when they need it, and always be ready to listen or share. Give them things, like sweets or cups of coffee. Always smile, and hold eye contact. Laugh at their jokes – stuff like that. Always support them, I guess,” Jinwoo rambles, smiling softly to himself.

Dongmin nods, thanks him, and remains silent for the rest of the afternoon. Jinwoo hopes his advice helps Dongmin’s song come along. Though, distantly and abstractly, he wonders if the advice wasn’t for a song at all.

 

+

_“Binnie, would you like some ramen?”_

Jinwoo hears Dongmin call through his bedroom door.

_“Yes, please, Dongmin.”_

_“Which flavour? I’m going out to buy some.”_

_“Can I come?”_

_“Of course.”_

Jinwoo takes note that the two have left, and goes to check the whereabouts of Sanha and Minhyuk. When he can’t find them, he asks Myungjun. “Where are our babies?” He jokes, tapping his boyfriend’s head softly.

Myungjun rolls over on the couch, onto his back, and looks up at Jinwoo. “They went to the studio to practice,” he tells Jinwoo. He looks confused when a look of utter delight crawls onto Jinwoo’s features.

“And Dongmin and Bin just left, too…” Jinwoo grins.

Myungjun reaches a hand out to cup Jinwoo’s jaw. “Wanna make out?” He asks, eyes sparkling.

“You’re so blunt,” he chuckles in reply, pressing a kiss to Myungjun’s cheek.

“Yet irresistible.”

“Exactly.”

Jinwoo just about leaps onto the couch, hovering over Myungjun and straddling his body. Craning his neck, he connects Myunjun’s lips with his, soft and slow and sweet, at first. Myungjun’s warm lips fit perfectly in his own, Jinwoo reckons. He brings a hand up to Myungjun’s chin, guiding his head, using his other hand to support his weight. The boy below him stretches his arms out, fingers twirling around the strands of hair at the back of Jinwoo’s head.

Jinwoo moans softly, never wanting this to end. This was all he ever needed and wanted – to be with Myungjun, alone, connected. To feel Myungjun’s warm and flushed skin against his own, chastely, sweetly, and without the knowledge of anyone else. Secrecy. Privacy.

Myungjun hooked his ankle around Jinwoo’s – and Jinwoo began to wonder if they’d ever get further than this, if there would ever be another opportunity _to_ go further than this. They’d discussed it, but both understood the risks of making love in a shared dorm house with four of their closest friends. Myungjun had joked that they book a room in a love motel – and Jinwoo was starting to think that wasn’t such a bad idea.

“Jinwoo,” Myungjun murmurs beneath him, a sultry flavour to the name.

Jinwoo decided he would have snatched up the opportunity if it weren’t for a sudden gasp behind them, and the ruckus of a plastic bag as it dropped to the floor. Not a second later, the front door slammed shut as the observer hurries to leave.

Jinwoo shoots upright, and Myungjun follows quite quickly. His lips are red and puffy from being bitten at and overused against Jinwoo’s. Tripping backwards onto the other side of the couch, Jinwoo groans, hiding his face in his hands. He hadn’t seen the person who had seen them – but they certainly knew of their secret.

“Oh… God, whatdowedo?” Myungjun asked, the last few words tumbling out of his mouth in a rush. From his chest to the top of his head is flushed red.

“Do we have any choice other than to come clean?” Jinwoo mumbled, sentence muffled from behind his fingers.

Myungjun stays silent, shaking his head softly. Ever the happy one, he refuses to let the sudden shock and mild fear make the air feel stale – he crawls over to Jinwoo and rests his head on his lap, peering up at him. Reaching over, he pulls Jinwoo’s hands away from his face and puts them into his hair. “We can do this. We’ll get through this,” Myungjun tells him, a small smile on his lips.

Jinwoo sighs softly, momentarily losing himself in the deep brown eyes below him. He takes Myungjun’s words into consideration – _we_. _We’ll_ get through this. Jinwoo doesn’t know if he’d be able to do anything without Myungjun by his side anymore. “I love you,” Jinwoo promises.

“I love you, too!” Myungjun grins, effortlessly beautiful as his huge smile creates small dimples in his cheeks. Jinwoo believes he could die happy, just looking at that cute face.

(But for now, there’s a much more pressing matter at hand.)

 

+

Sanha sits across from them, smiling widely as he’s handed many plates of food and a few sweets, too. Steam rises from some bowls, and he gratefully sniffs at the air, almost drooling at the sight before him. Jinwoo holds a pair of chopsticks in his hand.

“Where’s Minhyuk?” He asks, raising an eyebrow.

Sanha pouts dejectedly, as it appears he won’t be receiving the chopsticks anytime soon. “He wanted to choreograph a new dance, and I bought some sweets from the store on the way home. Don’t tell the manager, please,” he smiles cheekily. When he realises it isn’t quite the time to be joking around, he shuffles further down in his seat.

“Where’s Dongmin and Moonbin?”

“How am I supposed to know?”

 _They’ve been gone an awfully long time for some ramen,_ Jinwoo thinks to himself, beginning to feel a bit worried for them.

“What did you see, when you came home?” Myungjun asks, leaning forward slightly. He’s acting as if on a crime detective show. He even asked if he could turn off all the lights bar the one that hovered over the dining table. Jinwoo apprehensively disagreed.

Sanha blushes, hand covering his mouth – perhaps a smile. “You two were kissing,” he says, and giggles a little bit. He looks so embarrassed and Jinwoo remembers he’s just a kid, and feels a bit guilty for interrogating him.

“And, what do you promise?”

“To not tell anyone, anyone at all. Except Manager, because he already knows,” Sanha recites, eyeing the shining chopsticks in Jinwoo’s hand.

“Pinky swear?” Myungjun asks, extending his pinky for Sanha to link with his own. Quickly, the teenager hooks their smallest fingers together, and snatches the chopsticks from Jinwoo’s grasp. “Thanks for the food,” he giggles, already devouring the food before him.

“Don’t thank us – it was a bribe for you to stay quiet about us,” Jinwoo sighs, resting his chin in his hand. He won’t lie; he was a little bit jealous of the bribery food they’d given Sanha.

Sanha eats quietly, keeping casual chatter with Myungjun and Jinwoo. It felt as if nothing had changed, and Jinwoo was utterly grateful. He’d have hated it if, suddenly, their group dynamic had changed because of his relationship with Myungjun. Of course, they were still yet to tell three others.

“When did you two start dating?”

“It’s been… 238 days,” Myungjun answers, sounding proud. He looks over at Jinwoo to check, cheeks dusted red. He smiles softly when Jinwoo nods.

“Ooh,” Sanha exclaims, taking a bite of chicken. “What did you do for your 200-day anniversary?” Jinwoo feels relieved and excited that Sanha seems so interested in the details of their relationship.

“Remember that night Myungjun and I had an interview that never ended up getting released because they accidentally lost the footage?” Jinwoo smirks, and Sanha nods, eyes wide. “Manager let us sneak out on and go on a date! The interview never happened.”

“He got me flowers,” Myungjun blushed, gushing to Sanha. Sanha covers his mouth again, giggling. Jinwoo is delighted.

Only three confessions left to go.

 

+

“You told Dongmin?!” Jinwoo cries, sitting upright. Myungjun hides his face beneath the blankets, away from Sanha and Dongmin’s gaze below them. Jinwoo and Myungjun were snuggling on the top bunk, when Dongmin dragged Sanha in behind him and demanded answers.

“I couldn’t help myself!” Sanha cries, stamping his foot. “Dongmin asked me for help writing a love song and I didn’t have any advice so I told him to come to you. It was an accident – I swear!”

Jinwoo rolls his eyes, letting his head drop into his hands. Dongmin was still writing his song? Interesting. It’s been weeks – he hasn’t submitted anything.

“You owe us for that bribe meal,” Myungjun mutters from beneath the blanket.

“They bribed you into staying silent?” Dongmin asked, a smile crawling onto his lips.

“It was rather sudden, when he found out…” Jinwoo blushed, looking at his hands.

“How’d you find out?” Dongmin teased, bumping shoulders with Sanha. He stuck his tongue out at Myungjun, who cried out in embarrassment.

Sanha giggled, “I caught them making out on the couch.” This time, Jinwoo lets out a cry of embarrassment. Dongmin blushes, awkwardly stifling a chuckle.

“We might as well just tell the rest of them,” Jinwoo grumbles to Myungjun, who whines but peels the blankets off his body, anyway.

 

+

“Oh. That’s cool,” Minhyuk answers, only glancing up from his video game on his phone briefly to congratulate the two on their relationship.

Sanha thumps him in the back of the head, “Be more supportive,” he demands, but Jinwoo tells him not to worry. As long as no one is against his love for Myungjun, he’s okay with the response, no matter how casual. Myungjun seems rather put out that Minhyuk doesn’t show any excitement, though.

“That’s really nice!” Bin cheers, wrapping each of them in a hug. “I’m glad,” he smiles softly, eyes turning up into crescents. Jinwoo feels his heart grow warm at the gesture.

He looks around at the group of five boys surrounding him. His entire life, for the past few years, sits before him. Myungjun, tucked under his arm. Moonbin and Dongmin, side by side on the couch watching TV. Sanha and Minhyuk, trying desperately to connect their phones over the Wi-Fi to play a multiplayer game. “Thank you, everyone, for understanding,” Jinwoo tells them, and they all tease him for being too sentimental.

That night, as Myungjun nuzzles into his side, and Sanha kicks their mattress up from underneath them for cooing too much at each other, Jinwoo feels his insecurities slip away like the light of day. Myungjun presses a soft peck to the centre of his forehead, and pushes his hair down over it, _‘to protect the kiss, JinJin,’_.

_‘You’re crazy, MJ.’_

_‘You love me.’_

_‘I do.’_

_‘You two! Shush! I need to sleep!!’_

**Author's Note:**

> if you enjoyed dont look at my tumblr its a mess


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